‘Aged Like Milk’: 50 Things That Didn’t Stand The Test Of Time (New Posts)

Few people arrive at adulthood without sharing embarrassing takes online. Scroll down long enough and I think most of us have something on our social media profiles that we could be dragged for.

Mark Travers, Ph.D., who is an American psychologist with degrees from Cornell University and the University of Colorado Boulder, and is the lead psychologist at Awake Therapy, thinks that being mocked on the internet has very little to do with you — reacting to your post is often just an opportunity for the haters to get recognition. Once your post is no longer trending, he wrote in Forbes, they will move on to the next big post to hate on. 

With this in mind, the psychologist suggests not engaging if you end up featured on a subreddit like this one or start receiving negative attention on social media.

"People who attempt to put you down online are doing so for reasons beyond your control. You will not be able to reason with an angry mob," he said. "Aiming hurtful comments at you on social media is ‘safe’ because they only see you as a social media handle. Often, they may just be virtue-signaling their way into their fifteen minutes of fame and unwilling to recognize that you are a real human being."

We express ourselves online because that is how we feel at the time. People change, however, Travers believes there is no need to prove yourself with petty back-and-forths with those we don’t know.

"This will just add fuel to the fire and cause more people to jump on the we-hate-you bandwagon," he explained. "While you may be tempted to ruminate on the loudest and meanest comments, don’t let your negativity bias trip you up. There are several people on social media who will offer their support, kindness, and understanding. Focus on these comments."

As a rule of thumb, don't post anything on social media that you wouldn't stand by in real life. But unless your post is illegal or in any way harmful to you or others, don’t delete it just because you are being dragged online.

"Doing so will not prevent further backlash as people may have taken screenshots of your tweet or post. Deleting your post will give them more fodder to troll you," Travers explained.

"Also, stay true to your opinions. The dragging will pass as soon as the haters get bored and people will respect you for being strong-willed. This could translate to more online connections with people who see eye to eye with you," the psychologist explained.

In her book 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do, licensed clinical social worker and psychotherapist, Amy Morin, included a chapter about the dangers of dwelling on the past.

She said you can't be your strongest self when your brain is preoccupied with prior mistakes, past hurts, and nagging regret.

Although a certain amount of self-reflection can, of course, be healthy for you, sometimes you need to be able to focus on the present and let go of the past, including those confusing posts you made too. Looking backward makes it impossible to enjoy what's going on around you right now.